Instant Clichés, or “Acronumbs”

Many humans and congresspersons are unaware of the origins and primary definitions of the popular acronyms with which the illiterate, who believe they have as much right to use clichés as those who can actually spell words, pepper their online discourse. Below, as a service to those who employ them, I have listed the most popular ones and their meanings. Please keep this list close to you when at the brain-eating device of your choice.

IMO: I Must Ovulate.

IMHO: I Miss Having Orgasms.

LMAO: Let Me Ask Oprah.

LOL: I Can’t Spell.

OMG: Oscar Meyer = Guts. Also (in rural Ohio): Order My Gherkin!

BTW: Bu … ? The …? Wha … ?

FYI: Flap Your Intestines! (a command used by instructors of internal aerobics)

ROFLMAO: Ran Over Frank. Lots More Available Organs.

: ) = I love laying on my side.

; ) = I was just kidding about loving laying on my side.

XXOO = I was never very good at Tic-Tac-Toe


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